Rainbow Unicorn

What you're getting

Here's the rewritten description in Sam's voice:

Your modern unicorn is a white horse with a long spiraled golden or white horn sprouting from its forehead. But that's not how things used to be. Back in medieval times, people imagined something quite different — a creature the size of a donkey or goat, still white, but with a deer's head, a horse's body, a lion's tail, a goat's beard and cloven hooves. It was meant to represent purity and faithfulness, and nobody thought you could ever tame one.